


A Curse Until the Beginning

by for_t2



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Curses, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, Friends to Enemies, Hopeful Ending, Past Angel/Buffy Summers, Season/Series 03
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-25 00:20:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21108389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/for_t2/pseuds/for_t2
Summary: Finding out that the person Buffy loves isn't her soulmate is hard enough. Finding out that the person she hates is... That's even harder





	A Curse Until the Beginning

The books said nothing. 

Buffy doesn’t usually like research. She’s supposed to fight the demons and the forces of darkness, not study them – she’s the Slayer, not the Studier. But when she has to, she has to, and so she will, albeit kinda grumbly. 

And tonight, she has to. 

She’s seen Angel naked before. Once, on a night which should’ve been a memory to cherish forever, but which she’d rather forget. But it wasn’t until a few nights ago, when she found him crawling in the mud, snarling in the dark forest, when she took him to an abandoned house and tried to wipe the grime off, that she saw everything, that she had the chance to let her gaze linger. 

And what she didn’t see terrified her. 

The jagged scar in front of her right shoulder, a small black sword, twisted and sharp, the mark etched into her skin the day she was born by the Powers-That-Be, the mark that binds one soul to another… 

Angel didn’t have it. 

He didn’t have anything. 

***** 

Giles wiped his glasses.

He always does that. Buffy thinks it’s part stuffy British habit, part stuffy old guy habit, and part because maybe even Giles needs to take a break from the world sometimes. Of course, it could also be because his glasses get dirty, but does that really seem plausible?

“That’s a difficult question to answer, Buffy.” 

“How?” 

“The soulmark curse is an ancient form of magic, a parting gift from the Old Ones. I’m hardly an expert.” 

“But there’s so many books!” Buffy jabbed at the multitude of shelves around the library to make her point. Even Giles has to admit she has a point. 

“The curse has been extensively studied, but—” 

“So?” 

“But only in humans,” Giles said, as gently as he could. “Not in vampires.” 

“I can’t be the only person who’s loved a vampire,” Buffy replied. “Right?”

“Right,” and there he was, cleaning his glasses again. “But most of the recorded cases in the literature are… obsessive in nature. Of…” And he’s getting fidgety the same way he always does when he thinks something’s inappropriate. “Of people being consumed by their base instincts.” 

“You mean people who wanted some undead sexy times.” 

“I’m not aware of any connections of the type that the curse recognises. Of the type you had with Angel.” 

“Can you check?” If Buffy could keep the desperation out of her voice, she would. If she could just make Giles feel how badly she needs this, how much it’s tearing her up inside, she would. “Please?” 

“Is there something I need to know?”

“Please, Giles. Please.” 

The silence that followed was broken only by the school bell. 

“I suppose I could make a few phone calls.” 

“Thank you!” Buffy leapt up and grabbed her bag. She doesn’t want to give Giles the chance to doublethink. It might be one of the only times Buffy’s been eager to get to class. 

“Buffy?” Giles called out before she reached the doors, his voice too cautious for Buffy’s liking. “The curse is deep and powerful magic. There have been countless people who have tried to manipulate it’s magic. It never ends well.” 

Buffy stood silent. 

“Whatever dimension Angelus is in now…” Giles said, before trailing off. “Please don’t try anything reckless.” 

***** 

“Soulmates? Bullshit.” 

“Come on Faith, you don’t believe that.” 

“B,” Faith pratically jumped over the gravestone in her path. “Trust me. I’ve seen a lot of people meet their ‘soulmates.’ Never ends well.” 

“Then what’s the point?” There has to be a point. There has to be. And as much as Buffy usually likes the way she finds she can relax around Faith, sometimes Faith is a little… rough. 

“What’s the point?” Faith shrugged. “It’s a curse!” 

‘You mean we don’t need it?” 

“Exactly!” 

“But…”

“You go out there,” Faith continued before Buffy had the chance to reply. “Find whatever guys or girls or whatever you want, and you have fun. Forget about this curse bullshit.”

Sometimes Faith is good at cheering Buffy up. Oftentimes. And tonight is no exception. “I guess,” Buffy mouth parts into a little smile. 

“Life’s simple, B. You just gotta—” 

Buffy has her stake out before Faith could finish. There’s nothing like a couple vampires to take a slayer’s mind off things. So she charges. 

***** 

“What do you mean?”

Buffy wants to curl up even further. Wants to keep crying, even if it feels like her eyes have run dry.

“You might’ve missed—” 

Buffy shakes her head before Willow can finish. “Will, he didn’t.” 

“Oh.” 

It was bad enough, the way the rest of the gang stared at her when she walked into the library, the way they accused her, accused Angel. But for Will to be so understanding now, so helpful, those are feelings Buffy just can’t process right now. 

“He didn’t.” 

Buffy just needs it to be over. 

***** 

“B, you’re hurt.”

After the Evil Watcher Incident, things with Faith got a little rocky. Rocky in the sense that Faith disappeared for a couple of weeks, then spent a couple weeks being all avoidy around the Scoobies. Fortunately, she was getting back to normal, and Buffy couldn’t be happier. Especially since Faith makes this adorable frowny face. 

“It’s not that bad.”

“No, come on,” Faith reached for Buffy. “Let me give you a hand.” It’s also kinda adorable when she tries to be gallant. 

“If you insist,” Buffy said, as melodramatically as she could. And, sure enough, it pulled a smirk out of Faith.

“Oh, I do.” Faith replied as she helped Buffy. “I think…” 

Silence. 

Somewhere in the fight, a hole appeared in Buffy’s shirt, probably from one of the demon’s claws. A hole just big enough, and in just the right place, for the outlines of Buffy’s mark to show through. 

And the sight of it made Faith shut up in an instant. 

“Faith?” 

“It’s getting late, B.” The playfulness her tone held just a few seconds ago had disappeared, replaced with the same blankness Buffy hated to hear. 

So Buffy pulled her jacket back on quickly. She didn’t want to talk about Angel either. “When we’re done, we can go hit the Bronze. They’ve just started—” 

“It’s late.” And Faith started walking away before Buffy could stop her. 

“You okay, Faith?” 

“Five by five.” 

***** 

“Aren’t vampires supposed to remember everything?”

“Only after we’re turned.” 

“Oh.”

Angel took another sip of his blood. “Buffy, you have to understand, Liam wasn’t – I wasn’t a every good man.”

“I’m sure—” 

“I wouldn’t’ve believed in love. Especially not soulmates.” 

*****

“You kill me, you become me.” 

And, sure, maybe Faith wasn’t wrong when she said that Buffy wasn’t ready for that yet, but that doesn’t mean Buffy can’t kick her ass in the meantime. And she intends to. 

Buffy tried to save Angel. There was an Angel to save – a soul there to save. He didn’t choose to go dark. Faith did. Faith chose to kill, chose to kill again, she chose to betray being a slayer, and she chose to betray Buffy. 

“What’s the matter, B?” 

This is personal. 

So when Buffy charges at Faith, she doesn’t hold back. She goes at her with every bit of strength, every bit of fury, she has. 

Unfortunately, a slayer against a slayer makes for a pretty even match. So far, Buffy’s won most of the battles, but the war is far from over. Tonight is no exception. 

“Ready to give up?” 

Buffy tries match the way Faith’s weight shifts. The way she gets ready to pounce. The way she… “What did you do?”

“Huh?” 

And if this was personal before, it’s even more personal now. “This is sick, even for you.” There is something so fundamentally wrong, so utterly evil about the idea of stealing Buffy’s mark. After everything that’s happened to them, the thought that Faith would go as far as to pretend to be Buffy’s… Buffy’s not even going to let herself think it. 

“Huh?” And Faith looks as stupidly confused as she always does. 

“How dare you.” 

And it’s only after Faith follow’s Buffy gaze, down to her stomach, where she shirt hitched up during the fight, that she gets it. Smirks. “Give us a kiss.” 

Buffy charges. 

And, for the first time, Buffy’s ready to kill.

***** 

“Buffy, I’ve told you that the records—”

“What records?” Because, of course, Wesley has to interfere. He always has to. 

“Um…” Buffy can at least appreciate that Giles is trying. “Just an old debate of ours.” 

“A debate?” And Buffy really doesn’t like the way Wesley puffs his chest out at that. “I used to be leader of the debate team at school. I was trained in over fifteen different styles. I’m sure I can help shed some light on the issue.” 

Oh, god. 

***** 

“I suppose.” 

A typical broody answer from Angel. And it’s not the one Buffy wants. “But mortal enemies! Like…” And obviously she’s not going to say like who. “Like you and me. Slayer. Vampire. Mortal enemies!” 

“Some philosophers say the greatest of loves is passion.” 

Okay, so maybe Buffy wasn’t planning on having an existential debate with Angel as they walk out of the cinema. But the movie they saw was-- 

Pain. 

It takes Buffy a moment to focus her senses back together. To focus on the pain. On the arrow sticking out of her shoulder, right through her mark. 

“Buffy!” 

And she can barely hear Angel as he rushes to help her. 

She barely feels him as he picks her up. 

All she can focus on is turning her head. On the crossbow in Faith’s hands, as she leans back on the roof. On Faith’s winking.

***** 

“I think I’ve figured it out.” 

“Please tell, F.” And Buffy injects as much venom as she can. 

“These,” Faith says as she gestures at their matching marks. “These mean that I get to be the one to kill you.” 

They fight. With a raw, passionate brutality, with a hatred and a desperation that Buffy’s never felt before. That she isn’t sure she’ll ever feel again. It’s a fight that seems to take forever yet is over too quickly.

“You did it.” 

And Buffy doesn’t have the time to feel the fear, the pain of Faith’s blood on her hands, the knife in Faith’s stomach, before Faith is falling. 

***** 

Soulmates. 

Maybe for the first time, Buffy can let herself believe it. 

Standing over Faith, far too pale, far too bruised, far too still, the hospital machines beeping quietly, Buffy feels everything. Even if Faith was in a coma, they still defeated the Mayor. Together, the way it should be. And, now… 

Maybe for the first time, Buffy can let herself want it. 

So she does the only thing she can do. She leans over and, as gently, as tenderly as she can, she kisses Faith.

“Come back.”


End file.
